Living "as if"

Last night we had a meeting of the Session, those folks who have agreed to serve as leaders of this congregation for a while. One of the most difficult things they have to do each year is to determine how we spend the dollars people entrust to us for ministry.

In 20 years of ordained ministry, (and some pretty serious pre-ordination involvement!) I have been at a lot of these meetings. But never at one quite like this one.

In the last year, we've felt called as a church to take a number of risks: to do major renovation on our campus, to increase what we do in Mission, and to call an associate pastor. In addition, the global financial crisis has taken its toll on any interest income we might have been able to fall back on in previous 'lean years', as well as making people anxious about finances in general.

Pledges from members and friends have been trickling in as the year draws to a close, and many of them are generous, but there are dozens of folks who pledged last year from whom we've not yet heard, and what they might be able to give in '09 is anybody's guess.

And one more thing you should know: Presbyterians tend to be predictable. We tend to like order, deliberateness, level-headed steadiness. We, as a group, tend to be rather risk-averse. It makes us nervous and edgy.

Like I say, I have been at a few of these meetings before, and I know how it goes. The air is typically so tense it vibrates. People tend to say things like: "I know their work is valuable, but I don't see why Nurture needs so much money. Perhaps THEY could volunteer to take a cut in their portion of the budget." and so on. By the end there are often raised voices and hurt feelings. I hate it.

And here is what happened: They looked at this budget that is 85 THOUSAND dollars out of balance (a lot of money by any account, but huge in a 500 thousand dollar total), and they discussed it. One committee chair very graciously suggested how their committee could cut some costs in the coming year.

The discussion continued: thoughtful, theologically sound, reflective, thorough, responsible.
At the end of the conversation, they voted, unanimously, to adopt this budget, because it felt to them like what God was inviting them to do.

There was an astonishing level of balance, of civility, of trust. There was a glaring lack of anxiety, short-sightedness, or competition. They just did it.

At the end of our meeting, as we reflected on where we'd sensed God's presence, our new Associate Pastor Eric said,
"I have NEVER seen a Session adopt a budget this risky. Without fighting. Unanimously."
I nodded vigorously.
"It's as if," he continued, "You really have faith that God is involved here. And that you really trust each other. "

Yep.
It's as if there's something remarkable going on here,
something will are willing to take risks for
something we are willing to sacrifice for.
Something that invites us to trust God and each other,
that calls for the best in us
that promises a remarkable year ahead.

I do not know where all the money will come from, but I believe that this impossible sum is an invitation to rely one the One who calls us.

Lets live "As If. "